Miles to go before i sleep....

I laughed after a very long time, and laughed like hell.. there is this laugh which is unstoppable, you try your best but you simply can't and you just laugh ,and that laugh happened to me..Even Ertyaas was looking at me with a surprising smiling look. Sitting at the main center square of Amsterdam's red light area, where the smell of hash is making all of us high, we discussed on the same question of what to answer if our child asks the reason of creating her.... and she insisted on me being afraid of the responsibility and i told her i want to adopt a child instead of having my own and we laughed for a long time after that. Perhaps my laughter was due and the free city of Amsterdam was the right place and the right time for that........ bouncing and rolling we came to our hotel and sitting on the balcony of smoky thoughts and petrified emotions i thought how many more cities do i need to cross, how many more continents do i need to pass how many unstoppable laughs i have to laugh before i reach the ethereal city of symbols, where my "desire" horses may finally be able to rest and my "hope" soul may finally be able to sleep in my beloved's lap and i remembered robert frost's lines

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

and i knew right beside me ertyass was also thinking the same at that very moment....

Sitting on Kafka's shore....thinking.....waiting......!

Kafka’s shore is where things transform and become better or worse , the reality becomes a dream , the concept of time shrinks and expands with the amount of emotions we want to live in them and that’s how Ado’s beach happened to me. A place where a great river enters into an even greater sea,
all eternal….all symbolic
a lone tree… a lonely fisherman…. a fish that wants to be caught
a river which knows its destiny …. a sea which accepts all

I am beginning to see an irreversible change happening in me, as if I am being pulled into higher concentrations of existence ,these connectivity of symbols showing a way, a world opening itself and the reality world is anxiously trying to keep me with herself, flirting with all sounds and furies…. a glass broken… a game lost…. a plate about to fall.. all mere unconscious involuntary acts but all trying to remind me of the world I am living in… and then the other world of symbols which is now transforming my whole being into a dream, … and as if tranced by the old spells of African tribes I am being flown away into it , into a place where I don’t need opposites to give meaning to things, where magic becomes the sole logic of understanding….a promise of absolute purity without the concept of time, ahhhh such a bliss......

The gravity of this world is now pulling me apart , and living in a limbo I soon have to say farewell to one of them.........